Self-assessment isn’t a one-time event. It’s an activity that should be engaged often to evaluate our performances and commitment towards our long-term goals. It provides an avenue to uproot distractions that are not worth your time but have been picked up along the line because of interrelationships with your environment and people around you.
No major success happens by coincidence. In a bid to advance and become more relevant, you may find yourself engaging in a series of time-wasting activities that really don’t add up to your targets. These acts often start unconsciously, and they manifest in different forms. There’s no better time than now to evaluate your sense of timing and uproot these things which aren’t worth your time.
Procrastination is just a well-germinated seed of perfectionism. The feeling or desire to want something done the best way possible makes people develop the habit of waiting for the right time to execute any given task. The real truth is that there’s never going to be that perfect time. We weren’t genuinely waiting for the perfect time, either. We were only waiting for a convenient time to execute the task.
Perfectionism takes the form of being extremely analytical and critical of one’s idea. In the end, the search for that perfect idea capable of transforming the situation remains a mirage. It is the little things that work. It is our ability to break our tasks into smaller units and get them done within a specific timeframe that matters.
People often dump great ideas because they did not start perfectly as they desired, or they simply didn’t get on to that flying start that they had conceived. It genuinely sounds great to a boss seeing his workers strive endlessly towards perfection. But if you get very critical of your ideas or goals, you may just start seeing the difficulties which may cloud your creative mind.
You need to challenge yourself into becoming a better version of yourself, a practicable principle of growth. Still, you’re not going to get beyond mistakes. No one actually does. You can fill up those moments of kicking yourself with another attempt at excellence. If there is something that isn’t worth your time, it’s spending time kicking yourself over a particular issue.
2. Irrelevant arguments
Have you ever found yourself trying so hard not to argue with another person over his opinion of a particular issue or someone? And you still ended up spending hours in such discussions? A good number of people often think that arguments are another medium for learning. But how effective could this be? We often forget that arguments are simply a series of propositions presented in order to ensure one’s opinion prevails.
There are healthy clashes of opinions that can be properly analyzed. However, most arguments are characterized by tensions, insulting responses and unnecessary topics. It is like going around a circle for a long time, and one suddenly halts at a particular period. The hostility and the criticism aren’t by any means worth your time. In avoiding these arguments or simply protecting a relationship from being fractured, it’s safer to use terms like “you may be right,” “I’ll think about it,” and “I understand.” These terms do not mean that you’ve accepted the other opinion as a prevailing one; it simply means you chose not to engage yourself in an exchange that could become heated.
Engaging yourself in arguments over the most suitable political ideology, the best actresses and actors, your favorite football stars, or house chores are simply a waste of time. People who have been addicted to this line of arguments find it difficult to accept what it really is – a waste of time.
3. Maintaining toxic relationships
What’s your favorite line of excuses in trying to maintain an abusive or toxic relationship? “I’ve invested so much in the relationship,” “I don’t know where to start from if I let him go,” “He’s probably going to change as these are just difficult times,” “What’s going to be people’s perception about me if I leave?” “Do I even have a better alternative?” “He’s the best when he’s in a good mood.” Any of these reasons could have provided you with an amazing relief, especially when they come with some interesting moments after an abuse. But the real truth is that those excuses are flat-out lies that you’ve told yourself long enough to believe.
The truth is that when a relationship is physically, emotionally or sexually abusive, it takes mental strength to walk away. You aren’t going to get a better person while you’re in an abusive relationship. And ending the relationship is a disaster waiting to happen. You only have to make it happen, or it will eventually. It’s not about “if,” but “when,” unless you decide to spend the rest of your life enduring and hoping – a series of events not worth your time.
A toxic relationship takes your time, your energy and your commitment until a bold decision is reached. Using indices such as the time spent fighting, regular feeling that you can’t do anything right and feeling depressed, a survey conducted in New York suggests that 71% of abusive relationships are caused by poor relationship role models like parents and relatives. Nursing the thoughts that you’ll change your partner is just not worth your time. In his book, You can be Right, or You can be Married, Adam Shapiro observed that only 17% of people are content with their partners. Do you know how 83% became unhappy? They gave themselves the excuse for so long and spent so much time with people who are just not worth their time.
4. Poor past decisions
Have you ever wondered why it’s easier for you to remember your negative experiences? Why you try so hard to let go but still find yourself wrestling with those memories? Here you have it. Several neuroscientists have observed that the human brain handles negative and positive information differently. Negative experiences require more thinking, and they are thoroughly processed. In simple terms, the brain is better at remembering bad events.
So, how are you expected to let go of past events since you can’t change how your brain works, and you don’t want to engage in things not worth your time? Letting go of negative past events sounds simple. However, it’s a deliberate effort, and it doesn’t happen by default. It begins with your ability to forgive yourself; this is born out of the recognition of our humanity. Understandably, some mistakes are disappointing and take time to heal. But it’s more beneficial to let go than waste time pondering on how they happened.
Quite a large number of people have difficulty letting go because they want to assume the position of the hero and appear perfect. Some want to blame other people for their own misfortunes continually. The first step is to forgive yourself. Own up your mistakes, focus on the ones you can change and not the ones you can’t change. Channel your energy in a positive direction. Bothering on your previous defeats doesn’t add any positive to your next battles. It’s simply not worth your time.
Frank Bruno was a famous fighter and the favorite in his bout against James Smith. The result was going in Bruno’s way until Smith found a way back and knocked out Bruno. After this event, Bruno suffered defeats in his next four fights. His defeat to Smith was his first, and it was just some wrong decisions that cost him the victory. But it paved the way for four more consecutive defeats. Bothering on your previous mistake is not worth your time. Shift your attention to something productive.
5. Convincing people about yourself
Humans have natural instincts that are genetically transferred to them. This simple truth manifests in our choices and influences our decisions. Irrespective of our differences, we all have a common instinct, a natural inclination to love. In return, we want to be loved, respected and appreciated. However, in reality, that’s not always the case, and trying to make that happen is actually not worth your time. Some people don’t like you because of your religion, career path, styles, heights, race, ideologies, and opinions. It’s impossible to change everything about you because you want to gain acceptance. So, why engage in what’s not worth your time?
The biggest mistake you’re probably making is failing to recognize that you’re the boss IN YOUR OWN LANE. The perceptions of other people are not really your concern. It’s just some superhuman thing trying to shape people’s perception or bend towards their opinion. The simple truth is you’re never going to please everybody. It’s best to recognize early that it’s an activity not worth your time.
This doesn’t mean a total disregard for people’s opinions; it literally means releasing our stress about other people’s opinions. Let go of the quest to be liked by everyone. People have no obligation to like you or accept you. It’s important to learn this and channel your energy towards becoming a better version of yourself. If there was any reason why you should consider your time precious and avoid distractions, it’s the thought of being successful to a stage where people no longer have to tell you who they think you should be or where they think you fit. Nobody wants a Lewis Hamilton on the football field playing soccer. If there were ever anyone who wanted that, they would have buried their opinion.
Nobody holds the opinion that Bill Gates would have done better if he had been an athlete or an actor. Keep your focus; rise above people’s perception because they aren’t always informed with adequate knowledge of your strengths and your weaknesses. Explaining yourself to people and trying to win everyone to your side isn’t worth your time. Asked if he reads people’s opinion, Warren Buffet responded, “We don’t read other people’s opinions. We want to get the facts and then think.” Place more value on your time. The quest for acceptance isn’t worth your time
6. Social media addiction
At that moment of loneliness and anxiety, opening your social media app to connect with friends, to read exciting stories, watch a comedy skit and engage in a conversation are some of the unlimited options that social media offers. You’d probably argue that it was worth your time at the early stages. After all, it takes a highly depressed person to engage in any of these soothing experiences and still remain in a state of anxiety. Like the beginning of every addiction, it becomes a constant medium of relief. As effective as social media could be in enhancing communications, should there be a conversation on whether it’s worth the time devoted to it?
An average American of the average age spends up to three hours a day on social media. These periods are associated with the pressure to post on platforms, to like several posts and give their comments. Some of these activities are efforts to raise the number of their followers and engage a broader audience. Scientific research has shown that as this process continues, our face-to-face relationships with friends are weakened, and there’s a subconscious process of conforming to the required standard of online friends. In addition, about ten percent of teens report being bullied on social media, and that report keeps increasing as the hostility on some social media platforms grows. It appears that social media is negatively affecting our mental health.
A 2018 University of Pennsylvania report recommended the reduction of time spent on social media to 30 minutes a day to reduce the risks of anxiety, depression and sleeplessness. Social media provides more distractions than what we conceive, and except if we’ve seized the opportunity for commercial purposes, social media is not worth the time we’ve accrued to it. During the day, take time off social media, give more time to people around you, and keep your phone in meetings or informal gatherings. This is just not about understanding it’s not worth your time. You also need to pay attention to your mental health.
7. Comparing yourself with others
The most confirmed route towards denying yourself happiness is comparing yourself to others. Theodore Roosevelt sums it up that “comparison is the thief of happiness.” Comparing yourself to others denies you the ability to appreciate your efforts and value your progress. It’s well not worth your time. Comparison is a poor yardstick for measuring progress because it’s designed in a negative format. Defeating this mindset begins with recognizing that there will always be richer, happier, smarter, healthier, and more famous or respected people than you. It’s impossible to win if comparing yourself to other people is the goal. Engaging in a fruitless task isn’t worth your time.
People have different goals with different abilities, plans and skills designed to achieve them. The people you often compare yourself also to have their moments of failure, disappointment and victories even if they find themselves in better positions than you do. You can’t be everything because you weren’t made for everything, neither do you have every skill or ability. Attempting to become everything isn’t worth your time.
At some point in our life, we all have moments when we watched the television and wanted to be the footballer being cheered when we logged in to social media and wanted the exact face of that social media celebrity. We’ve all struck a dagger through our self-esteem. However, you need a quick realization – wishing you were born into a richer family, with better health, a better face, a better environment and other things don’t change your immediate environment. It’s an activity not worth your time. People who get caught up in this thought end up focusing on their outcome and not the process. Trust your process; keep your pace. Comparing yourself to others isn’t worth your time.
8. Negative People
There are only two things the people in your life do. They either drain your energy or add to your energy; they either release your stress or add to your stress. The good news is that you reserve the selection rights for the ones worth your time. Negative people aren’t necessarily offensive. They are people who make your dreams look impossible; people who make you lose faith in your goals. These people aren’t worth your time. It would be best if you exercise your selection rights as regards the people you allow to be around you as much as you can.
Success has a magnetic force; it pulls the best people closer to you, people who would not have been selected by some ultimate search process. Keep the focus on your goals, do away with negative people, maintain your momentum, keep people who celebrate your small victories with you and challenge yourself to do better. Negative people aren’t worth your time.
It’s understandable that things that aren’t really worth your time may be genuinely difficult to do without. This is possible because they either bring so much fun, or they have taken enough of your time and energy to be called a habit now. However, your commitment to becoming a better version of yourself should distinguishably supersede habits that aren’t worth your time. All of those beautifully carved out plans and the brilliant skills you’ve mastered don’t have the luxury of time. Place more value on your time, don’t enjoy things that aren’t worth your time.